Alittle Of This And That

Ok, the hospital called me today for the surgery. First it was the Dec 10th but I could not do it on that date because I have to get the bone denstity test done and Pelvic ultra sound so the surgery is Dec 17th. I have to be there at 6:00 a.m. I know I need to get this done, it is WAY OVER DUE (7 years). I am so scared but at the same time I am thinking, well, I will be able to walk around the block with the kids with no pain, have nice romances with Joe with no pains and be able to wear jeans with the button on and the zipper up! It's been a hell of a long time since I was able to wear jeans buttoned and the zipper up! That is what I am looking forward to. Scared as hell but the pains are so unbareable at this point that I have no choice but to get this done and over with. The Dr said the surgery is going to take a few hours to get in there and do what he has to do and if it worst than what he thinks the surgery will take longer. As long as I am asleep and don't wake up in the middle of the surgery I will be ok, LOL. I had a dream lastnight that I was getting surgery and I woke up while they were doing their thing and I could feel every move, that was scarey! My mind is playing tricks on me now. So from now until Dec 17th, I am going to be a nervous wreck!

Tomorrow Joe and I have to go to the store and get a few things for Thanksgiving dinner. I need 2 stalks of celery, bread, gravy and dinner rolls. I have everything else. Since my parents live with me I don't have to invite them for dinner and since my mother in law lives here too, noone has to drive anywhere. I THINK my brother in law and sister in law an their 2 kids are coming. We usually have them over every year for Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is always nice, it is the start of the festivities of Christmas and I love it! I love the music, the kids getting excited for Christmas and Santa. I want to start putting up the lights around the house soon before it gets even colder than what it is now. Darn it is like in the 30's and 40's and winter is not even here yet. I think this winter is going to be a bad one like 93' and 95'.

Jonny has an appt with a child Phychologist so I am hoping they will change his medicines and help us with the meltdowns. I feel so bad. He was just sitting here tonight on the couch watching tv and out of nowhere the tears slowly went down his cheeks. All he said was "No Cry".I said, that's right Honey, no cry! He does this from time to time for no reason. I think he is at the age now where he knows he has a problem and wants to be like the other kids.I truely believe this and not being able to talk I know is a HUGE factor of his meltdowns. I cry all th time over Jonny. It saddens me so much to see him like this. I want to help him so bad but there is nothing more I can do but what we are doing now. I am starting to buy organic foods for him, he won't touch them yet but if I offer it everyday he might just one day pick it up and try it if there is nothing else for him to eat!

Well.... I hope everyone has a blessed and wonderful Thanksgiving! I am going to make home made choc chip cookies, cakes and things like that. the junk never lasts long here with Joe and Alyssa and my Dad... they love their junk food. I do too but I need to be in the mood for it.

Speakig of foods... when I went to the Dr's I weighed in at 111. YAY for me. I have been trying to gain some wight for like forever now. I stopped at Vernae's house the other day to drop off a candle order for her Mom's friend and Vernae noticed right away I gained some weight. I was happy when she said that! I am so sick and tired of hearing people say you are too skinny and you need to gain some weight. You know what I feel like saying?!?! Yea you know what I am thinking! Skinny is different than thin and thin is what I am, not skinny. The weight I seem to be gaining is going to the thighs and my butt. It usually goes to the boobs (that are hardly there, hehe) but this time it is going to the thighs and butt!


Bridgete, you go girl! I am so proud of you and your weight loss! Keep up the great work!! No matter how much weight you lose, you will always be beautiful to me!!

Ok.. enough of me tonight. If I don't get to write tomorrow

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO YOU ALL!!!